Phones Off, Please

Courtesy begins where convenience ends. The simplest sign of respect is keeping your phone off the table.

The Standard We Risk Losing

We have all seen it: the glowing rectangle parked proudly on the dinner table, buzzing like an unwanted guest.
Or worse, someone scrolling mid-conversation, nodding absently while you wonder if they even heard your last sentence.

Somewhere along the way, we decided the smartphone earned a seat at the table.
It has not.

Once, meals carried an unspoken rule: attention belonged to the people present.
A phone on the table was a signal of distraction, a small crack in the social contract.

  • Meeting a friend? The phone stayed pocketed.
  • Family dinner? No screens in sight.
  • Business lunch? The table was for conversation, not notifications.

Those small acts preserved presence, respect, and civility.


Why It Matters

A meal is not about eating; it is about acknowledgement.
A visible phone says, “I am elsewhere.”

One phone out begets another until the table looks like a call centre.
We lose the cadence of conversation, the weight of attention.

Courtesy in the twenty-first century is measured not by posture or tone but by presence.
Silence can be manners; absence never is.


The XXI Protocol

  1. Put It Away Entirely
    Not face-down, not half-hidden by a napkin. Away.
  2. Announce Exceptions
    If an urgent call is expected, state it before the meal. Clarity is courtesy.
  3. Make It a Rule
    At home or with friends, declare the table a phone-free zone.
  4. Lead Quietly
    People follow example, not enforcement. Presence persuades.

The Closing Word

Courtesy erodes quietly, then all at once.
Putting your phone away is not a grand gesture.
It is proof that the person in front of you still matters more than the screen beside you.